The real reason your boss is micromanaging you
Do you have one of the bosses who is always up in your business? Asking you questions incessantly. Sending you emails non-stop. Demanding updates on the hour and never quite satisfied with the amount (or quality) of information you are providing. Does it ever feel as if, no matter how thorough you are, or how “on top of it” you stay, it’s never enough?
It’s exhausting and relentless and demoralizing all at the same time. I’ve been there. And what I’ve learned it this—it’s not about you—it’s about them. It’s like the classic breakup line, “it’s me, not you…” But this time it’s true.
Your boss is all over you for one reason—because she is afraid. She’s afraid that you’re going to drop the ball. Miss a deadline. Screw up a client call. Or mess up royally in one way or another. Maybe you’re not doing what you’re supposed to do. Or you’re doing it (whatever it is) wrong. There’s a whole host of scenarios playing out in her mind, a never-ending loop of uh-ohs—something is going, or about to go, wrong. Unless she steps in and saves the day.
Maybe you’ve given her reason to believe this. Maybe you haven’t. That’s not really the point. The point is this—you’ve got to rewrite the narrative in her head. The good news is that you can with one simple fix: overcommunicate.
If you want to get someone off you’re a**, than you’ve got to overcorrect and swing far in the opposite direction. Start by giving them lots of (meaningful) information, so that they never have to wonder or guess what the heck is going on…
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I had this boss once. Let’s call her Mabel. Mabel was a powerhouse senior exec who was widely respected by colleagues but feared by her junior team. She was on top of us all, riding us hard day in and day out, never letting us breathe. At some point, I knew I’d break—I was losing my mind.
My only way out was through—and I decided to try something new. I realized I needed to play offense instead of waiting to play defense. I decided to go in the same direction as Mabel—I was going to give her a lot more information on a regular basis to keep her from reaching out to me first…
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I created the EOD Update. Every single day (night, in my case) before I left the office, I crafted an email with everything, and I mean everything, that was on my plate. In bullet format, I layed out the status of every project, deliverable, transaction, deal-team to-do. The point was not to overwhelm her with information—but to keep up-to-date in an easy to digest snapshot of where everything stood. So that she didn’t have to ask. She didn’t have time to wonder. She didn’t feel the need to ping, or pester or hover.
The underlying message was this: I’m on top of it. I’ve got it all under control. Nothing is slipping through the cracks or going unfinished.
I made her life easier. I made her life better. After a short time, she began to relax and anticipate my EOD Update, knowing that I would fill her in on anything and everything that was going on.
My daily Update gave her the comfort she needed so that she could rest assured that things weren’t about to spiral downward. Balls weren’t going to drop, deadlines weren’t going to be missed, clients weren’t going to feel neglected.
I even included what I call the “no news update.” If and when there was something outstanding and there was still no new information, I’d tell her that simple fact—again, so that she didn’t have to wonder.
So, if you find yourself with your own version of Mabel—ask yourself the question—what’s driving the behavior? Good chance your boss is afraid, just like Mabel was. The great news is that you too can shift the dynamic. Take back control by overcommunicating. Give your manager a well thought out update, or download, on where everything stands. Reach out proactively instead of waiting for the barrage of questions. And see where that takes you…
Thoughts? I’d love to hear from you.
Butler Community College•76 followers
1yYou have very good suggestions, but at the same time, I don’t feel like I should have to torture myself to appease a power hungry, fearful, narcissist.
Cook County Health•158 followers
1yGreat article I have been at both ends. Supervised by micromanaging boss and now in a manager position where close oversight is required as it impacts safety. To me it calls for self reflection of work habits and how it is perceived by the other party. As a employee who is micromanaged, there are 2 ways to think about it. Adopt defensive approach I am doing everything correctly and I don't need my boss constantly questioning me. Other approach Meet with the boss and ask what you have done or not done that's making them closely monitor . This shows that you are willing to clear the perception about your work habits . As supervisor, it is exhausting to micromanage and would want to depend on their staff . One must remember that every supervisor has a boss too and if they are pressured to complete a job and if they find their staff not able to complete it on time ,it's almost expected that they intervene and complete the job. Supervisor are sandwiched between their staff and their bosses. To make the team work, managers take the heat fromboth sides. Speaking as staff and manager, it calls.for open communication about expectations, clarifying project timeliness and changing work habits if needed to improve performance
Waterman Aspen•760 followers
1yWhy do I feel like I'm being gas lighted here? Micro management is wrong! I left a job I had been at for over 10yrs because of a micro manager that did my head in! Within a year of me leaving, the whole team was no more due to eveyone looking to get out! And his manager knew this and did nothing! Nobody likes to be micro managed so you will NOT get the best out of that person, other than stressing them out and destroying their mental wellbeing so you the micromanager feels better! Also if I'm not a manager, why am I having to work out how to solve their problem? I've got my own work to do, not work out my managers issues, i.e. lack of management skills. Let's be honest, micromanagnent is a sign of a poorly trained manager, who probably should not be in that position daily harnessing their team, especially the sky is constantly falling managers, they are the worst! Plus I've never known a micro manager to protect their team members, they are the 1st to throw them under the buss. It took me stepping away from a 10yr+ long term job to see I was getting depressed in it. It's been positive since then. If you micro manage, get help, and stopping stressing out your team, and create processes to easily manage and protect them.