Tips for Implementing a Coaching Mindset in 1:1s

Every one-on-one ends with an update. But 99% of one-on-ones don’t improve performance. Here are 10 moves to run a one-on-one like a leader: 1. Shift from updates to ownership. A one-on-one is not a report. It is a coaching session. A manager says, "Give me an update on everything." A leader says, "Before updates, what is one thing you are trying to improve right now." This single shift changes the whole meeting. It turns the employee into the driver, not the passenger. 2. Start with growth, not tasks. Open the meeting with their development. Keep it tight. One skill. One behavior. One outcome. When you begin with tasks, you train them to wait for instructions. When you begin with growth, you train them to think like an owner. 3. Use three coaching prompts every time. Run the first part of the one-on-one with these prompts. - "What are you trying to improve right now." - "Where are you seeing progress." - "Where are you getting stuck." This creates a simple loop. Goal. Evidence. Blocker. Progress starts when they own their growth. 4. Develop people, not just review work. Work review is easy. People development is leadership. Work review sounds like status. People development sounds like patterns. You focus on the habits behind the work. You coach the choices that create the work. That is where performance actually changes. 5. Focus on thinking, not just results. Results tell you what happened. Thinking tells you why it happened. The quality of thinking determines the quality of results. A manager says, "Great job hitting the number." A leader says, "Walk me through how you approached it." This turns a win into a system. 6. Make success repeatable. Plenty of people hit a goal once. Few can repeat it. The difference is clarity. They know what they did. They know what mattered. They know what to do again. Coach the process so the result can scale. 7. Debrief like a pro. Use a simple debrief. - What worked well. - What did not work well. - What will you do differently next time. This builds judgment. It also builds confidence. They stop guessing. They start learning on purpose. 8. Shape decision-making. Outcomes are lagging. Decisions are leading. Spend time on the decisions they made. The tradeoffs they chose. The risks they avoided. The risks they took. If you coach decisions, performance improves even when the work changes. 9. End with a clear commitment. A one-on-one without a next step is just a conversation. A manager ends with, "Keep me posted." A leader ends with, "What is one action you are committed to before we meet again." One action. Not five. Not a vague intention. A real move. 10. Measure the commitment. What gets measured gets managed. Commitments need a scoreboard. End with one more line. "How will we know it worked." Change happens between meetings, not during them. The meeting sets the aim. The week creates the proof.

Most 1:1s fall apart because they slowly turn into weekly status updates…or low-key therapy…or a mix of both. And once that happens, they start feeling VERY skippable. If you want your 1:1s to do more than just fill time, actually help your team learn and make progress, this is a format that actually works. Think of this as a guide, not a script. You won’t hit every point every time. A 1:1 format you can actually use every fortnight: 1️⃣ What’s been on your mind since we last spoke? Sets the tone. Human, not performative. 2️⃣ Where has work felt a bit stuck or harder than it needs to be? Keeps the conversation practical, not venty. 3️⃣ What are you trying to get better at right now? Keeps learning alive without turning the meeting into a goal-setting exercise. 4️⃣ What progress have you noticed, even small? Builds momentum without turning it into a performance review. 5️⃣ What’s one thing you want to move forward before we meet again? Light accountability with one clear next step. 6️⃣ What support do you need? No guessing plus support can come from anywhere. This works because it’s not about covering everything. It’s about making the time useful. Some weeks you’ll spend most of the 1:1 on one question. And some weeks you might move quickly through a few. Either way, you're having a way better conversation about learning and progress, plus what you both want out of work. If your 1:1s have been feeling a bit *optional* lately, try this next week. And if you know a manager whose 1:1s have quietly turned into calendar clutter, share this with them. #microlearing #managertips #workadvice

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝟏𝟓-𝐌𝐢𝐧𝐮𝐭𝐞 𝐂𝐨𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐇𝐚𝐛𝐢𝐭 𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐬 𝐏𝐢𝐩𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬 Most 1:1s are status updates in disguise. They sound like coaching, but they are really long versions of “Where are we on this deal?” If you want your weekly 1:1s to actually shift performance, try this simple 3-question framework. It takes fifteen minutes and turns the conversation into real coaching instead of reporting. 𝟭. 𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗺𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗱𝗲𝗮𝗹 𝗳𝗼𝗿𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝘄𝗲𝗲𝗸, 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘄𝗵𝘆 𝗱𝗼 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗶𝘁 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸𝗲𝗱? This builds awareness, not just activity tracking. Sellers learn what actually creates momentum. 𝟮. 𝗪𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝗱𝗶𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗴𝗲𝘁 𝘀𝘁𝘂𝗰𝗸, 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗮𝗹𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝘆 𝘁𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝗳𝗶𝘅 𝗶𝘁? This teaches problem solving instead of dependence. You hear their thinking, not just their challenges. 𝟯. 𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗶𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗴𝗹𝗲 𝗮𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗺𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗯𝗶𝗴𝗴𝗲𝘀𝘁 𝗱𝗶𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝗻𝗲𝘅𝘁 𝘄𝗲𝗲𝗸? This creates clarity, ownership, and a measurable focus for the next conversation. Fifteen minutes. Three questions. Consistent improvement. Coaching does not need a full hour. It needs intent, structure, and a manager who knows how to turn updates into learning. 𝑾𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒊𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒃𝒆𝒔𝒕 𝒔𝒂𝒍𝒆𝒔 𝒄𝒐𝒂𝒄𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒒𝒖𝒆𝒔𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒉𝒂𝒗𝒆 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓 𝒃𝒆𝒆𝒏 𝒂𝒔𝒌𝒆𝒅?

Through my Engineering Success Podcast at DevDynamics and working closely with engineering leaders, I’ve had the chance to speak with 200+ Tech leaders and CTOs from growth-stage startups. The way they approach 1:1s is nothing like the “textbook” method, and it’s brilliant. Here’s what I learned about their approach: 1️⃣ The “Look Back, Look Ahead” Format Instead of getting into daily updates, they dedicate time to two specific areas: Look Back: Recap the past month’s challenges, progress, and any learning moments. Look Ahead: Discuss upcoming milestones, skill growth, and their engineer’s long-term goals. 2️⃣ Less Status Updates, More “Personal Growth Talk” They avoid project check-ins here, that’s for team meetings. 1:1s are about the engineer’s growth path. What tools will get them closer to the next level? What’s slowing them down? The focus shifts from “What did you do?” to “Where are you headed?” 3️⃣ Scheduled “Unstructured” Time One of the best hacks? They allocate 10 minutes at the end of each 1:1 for any topic their engineer wants to discuss, work or otherwise. This time often reveals insights that structured agendas miss. 4️⃣ Customized to Personality Type Introverts prefer reflecting on paper, while extroverts benefit from free-flow discussions. They’ve even adjusted frequency based on personality, some engineers have monthly check-ins, others bi-weekly. 5️⃣ Follow-Up Through Actions Set follow-ups in the calendar. If a challenge was discussed, they’ll check in again in two weeks, turning words into measurable steps. Every 1:1 becomes a little system in itself, and it’s working for some of the besting performing teams. Have you tried any of these approaches? P.S. Do check the latest episode of the engineering success podcast with Pranabjyoti Bordoloi from Junglee Games. P.S. 2 - Unrelated photo - someone said photos work better on Linkedin

Great leaders run 1:1s differently. They've learned to use it to change how their team operates. The difference isn't time or frequency. It's what happens inside the conversation. After coaching 600+ tech leaders, here are 7 habits that separate great 1:1s from expensive status updates: (💾 Save this for your next 1:1.) 1️⃣ They are consistent with 1:1s. → They never cancel. → Even if they have to reschedule, they ensure consistent 1:1s. → In chaotic orgs where priorities shift weekly, a consistent 1:1 is sometimes the only stable thing your team has. 2️⃣ They let the direct report own the agenda. → Great 1:1s aren't manager-led. → The report brings the topics. The blockers. → When you control the agenda, you only hear what you already know. When they control it, you hear what you've been missing. 3️⃣ They show up prepared, not just present. → They've reviewed notes from last time. → They remember what was said. → In orgs where people feel invisible, a leader who remembers your last conversation builds more trust than any team-building offsite. 4️⃣ They talk less than 30% of the time. → They ask "What's getting in your way?" and then actually listen. → They resist the urge to solve. → In fast-paced orgs, leaders default to fixing. Great 1:1s are where you practice diagnosing instead. 5️⃣ They cover three layers, not one. → Tactical: what's happening this week. → Relational: how you're actually doing. → Developmental: where you're going long-term. → Most 1:1s only hit the first layer. That's a status update, not leadership. 6️⃣ They give feedback AND ask for it. → "Here's what I observed. Here's the impact. What's your understanding?" → Then: "What could I do differently as your leader?" → Leaders who ask for feedback build trust. 7️⃣ They end with clarity, not just conversation. → Who owns what. By when. What changed from last time. → In orgs where priorities shift constantly, your 1:1 is where your team gets the one thing they're desperate for: a clear signal. Average leaders use 1:1s to manage tasks. Great leaders use 1:1s to build the people who manage tasks without them. Which habit would change your 1:1s most? 📌 Want a PDF of this resource + access to my leadership hub? Get them free here: https://lnkd.in/gtEQnu9U ♻️ Share to help your network. ➕ Follow Ling Abson for practical leadership advice

Bad 1:1s don't feel bad. That's exactly what makes them dangerous. They feel fine. Productive, even. But nothing changes week to week, and you can't figure out why. The problem is almost always the same: the type of questions being asked. Here are 11 worth replacing yours with: 🟠 OPERATIONAL "What's on your plate right now, and does it feel manageable?" ↳ Capacity problems show up before performance problems. Ask early. "What does your number look like this week?" ↳ Every person should have a measurable. This keeps the conversation grounded in reality. "Is anything blocked that I can help clear?" ↳ Your job is to remove obstacles. This question makes that visible. 🟠 ACCOUNTABILITY "How are your priorities from last quarter tracking?" ↳ Quarterly priorities without a regular check-in are just intentions. Keep them visible. "Is there anything you said you'd do that hasn't happened yet?" ↳ Done well, this builds trust faster than almost anything else. "Are there issues you've been sitting on that we should name?" ↳ Problems that don't get surfaced don't get solved. This creates the habit of bringing things to the table. 🟠 GROWTH "What part of your work is giving you the most energy right now?" ↳ People do their best work inside their strengths. The answer tells you a lot about seat fit. "What part is draining you?" ↳ Every role has draining tasks. But if those tasks are core to the seat, you've got a bigger conversation to have. "What's one thing you'd like to get better at this quarter?" ↳ Great leaders develop their people. This question shows you mean it. 🟠 LEADERSHIP "What do you need from me that you're not getting?" ↳ Hardest to ask. Most valuable to hear. Surfaces your blind spots before they become someone's reason to leave. "Is there anything you want to say that you haven't felt able to?" ↳ Psychological safety gets built one conversation at a time. This question opens the door. If your 1:1s feel like a chore, these questions are the fix. Save this for your next one. If you want to go deeper on what it takes to build a team that's truly in the right seats... Pick up my book Issues: https://bit.ly/Issues-book And if you've ever hit a ceiling and wondered if the problem was you or your team, check out my podcast Hitting the Ceiling. Listen here: https://lnkd.in/g6nM7t8t ♻️ Share this with a leader who could use better 1:1s. Follow Mark O'Donnell for more on systems-based leadership.

What If Your 1:1s Became the Best Meeting of the Week? One-on-ones might be the least effective meeting in corporate America today. How do I know? They’re also the most frequently canceled. That’s a shame — because when done well, one-on-ones can build trust, accelerate performance, and create space for meaningful coaching. Here’s a 4-question framework to make your 1:1s something your team actually looks forward to: 1️⃣ What are you most proud of since our last 1:1? Start on a high note. This question energizes the conversation and gives your employee space to celebrate wins. Acknowledge their accomplishments and connect them to the broader impact. If you’ve noticed other great work, highlight it here too. 2️⃣ If you could do anything over again, what would it be? Once trust and psychological safety are established, this opens the door to reflection and learning. In my experience — and repeatedly confirmed through 360 assessments — employees are often their own toughest critics. This question makes constructive feedback a routine part of the conversation, rather than something that only shows up in performance reviews (where it can feel like judgment). 3️⃣ What are you looking to accomplish between now and our next 1:1 — and what’s your approach? This is a classic FeedForward moment. Reinforce their confidence, offer strategic input, and ensure priorities are clear. 4️⃣ How can I help? You might get “crickets” the first few times. Stay consistent. Over time, you’ll get thoughtful, genuine answers that deepen your partnership. When you follow this simple framework, your employee leaves each 1:1: 🔹Energized by what they’ve accomplished 🔹Reflective about how they can improve 🔹Clear on their game plan going forward 🔹Supported by you as their leader Now that’s a meeting worth keeping on the calendar! #OneonOne #coaching #Leadership #LinkedInbyScottZ

The 6 Coaching Questions Every Manager Should Use in 1:1s (Save this, you'll use it every week.) I used to think being a manager meant having all the answers. When I worked in finance, my team came to me constantly: “Can you review this?” “Is this the right approach?” “What do you think I should do?” I was flattered at first. I felt useful. Needed. Competent. But inside, I was exhausted. I wasn’t empowering people. I was making them dependent on me. So I shifted. I stopped jumping in with solutions. I started asking coaching questions instead. And people grew. They took ownership. They became leaders. After managing teams and coaching leaders across London, Singapore, Paris, and Hong Kong, these are the 6 coaching questions that consistently transform 1:1s: 1️⃣ What would meaningful progress look like this week? 2️⃣ Where are you stuck or under-supported? 3️⃣ Which skill do you want to level up this month? 4️⃣ If you were mentoring someone in your role, what advice would you give them? 5️⃣ What would make this 10% easier? 6️⃣ What conversation are you avoiding? You can find the full cheat sheet in the image. Save it for your next 1:1. Share it with a manager who wants to grow. And tell us: What would you add in #7? #leadership #coaching #leaderascoach #growth

Many early career professionals walk into 1:1s and wait for their manager to lead 🥸 Then, they leave wondering why nothing changes or why the conversations don't seem to take them anywhere. 1:1s are essential for providing momentum to your work, checking in on important topics and projects, and ensuring the development of a sound working relationship between you and your manager. Here are 3 things you can incorporate into your 1:1s to make them more effective ⬇️ ➡️ "Here's what I'm working on, and here's where I'm stuck." Reporting tasks is fine, but this doesn't necessarily show your accomplishments or outcomes. I like to share a specific challenge I've encountered since our last conversation and what I've already tried to navigate the challenge. This demonstrates initiative, problem-solving skills, and gives your manager something tangible to support you with. ➡️ "I'd like feedback on [specific thing]." Vague requests get vague answers. Dancing around a problem or a topic that you need straightforward insight on is worth asking about directly. Talk with your supervisor about a particular project, presentation, or skill. "How did I do on the report I shared with you on Tuesday?" is better than "Do you have any feedback for me?" ➡️ "I'm interested in [opportunity/skill/project]. What would help me get there?" Your supervisor may have some ideas about what you can work on and what you might be interested in, but they can't read your mind. If you want to grow in a certain direction or learn a new skill, speak up about it. Ask your supervisor what steps, people, or visibility would support your professional goals.

When your 1:1s feel like a to-do list item… it’s time to reset. Now, I know 1:1s are the subject of much debate these days re: to hold them or not to hold them. If you’ve found another way to achieve ongoing alignment with your team outside of 1:1s, more power to you, my friend. If you’re like me and still syncing with your direct reports on a scheduled cadence, hello there. I see you. 👋🏾 We know the time is valuable but to extract the value, we have to invest. Here’s 3 things that have worked well for me across the teams I’ve led. ⸻ ✅ Discuss the work — and the human doing it. Yep, we have projects, metrics, and deadlines to discuss. But we have to be mindful not to make these meetings purely transactional. Ask how your direct report is doing, not just what they’re doing - and be prepared for more than a one-word answer, when you ask (‼️). ⸻ ✅ Shared agendas for the win. The best 1:1s are employee-led, manager-supported. Period. Encourage your direct report to outline what’s most important — what needs discussion vs. what’s just an FYI. Come prepared with your own list too. It’s always a partnership, not a solo act. ⸻ ✅ Keep your word — and keep it consistent. If you’ve scheduled recurring 1:1s, consistency matters. Life happens of course (travel, PTO, deadlines) — but if you cancel more 1:1s than you hold, it sends a signal: “This time isn’t a priority.” And fair or not, that message endures. ⸻ ⚡️ Bonus: Go deeper, quarterly. Once a quarter, make space for growth conversations — the kind that look beyond today’s list of priorities. Use the space to dive in on career goals, development areas, and key wins. The best 1:1s move the work forward - and move your people forward too. #Leadership #ManagementTips #1:1s