How to navigate pitch meetings as a Black woman

Black women leaders are doing advanced leadership in basic rooms. The rules are only simple for some. They don’t account for misogynoir, power, or the cost Black women pay to be seen as competent. So while the agenda is being discussed, Black women are often doing two jobs at once: leading the work - and seeking a way to regulate themselves inside environments that were never built to hold that complexity. That’s why we’re often expected to be the “anchor” in the room. For the team. For the strategy. For the emotional temperature. Our ability to adjust to everyone else gets mistaken for ease. But here’s what nobody talks about: Many of us are floating in our own leadership whilst being anchors for everyone else. What we’re rarely taught is how to anchor ourselves. You walk into the meeting prepared. Data ready. Talking points sharp. But your body didn’t get the brief. So there’s a meeting happening on the surface - and another one happening inside you at the same time. Your breath shallows. Your jaw locks. Your feet hover instead of landing. A white colleague repeats the same words you were ignored for - and they’re received differently. Everything heightens. The conversation moves on. You’re still back there, playing catch-up in a room you were meant to lead. From the outside, it looks like composure. Inside, it’s endurance. That’s not a confidence issue. It’s a nervous system issue. When your body is scanning for threat, you lose access to what makes your leadership powerful: Your clarity. Your timing. Your authority. Your ability to respond - not react. This is why leadership doesn’t start IN the meeting. It starts BEFORE it. Before the agenda, there is the body. When I understood this, everything shifted. I stopped sitting on the edge of the chair. I pressed the balls of my feet into the ground. I felt the floor - and it reminded me: I am supported. I am meant to be here. I deserve to take up space. I stopped hoping meetings would go well. I started preparing my body so I didn’t have to abandon myself to lead. These are anchors - intentional, embodied cues that bring you back to yourself when pressure rises. No system is going to hand you back your authority. That shift has to happen inside the body. This is why I’m opening The Authority Shift™️ - a 2-day intensive for Black women leaders who are done abandoning themselves to lead. We begin 14 March 2026. DM me “SHIFT” for early access details. Because surviving the room is not the same as leading it. ♻️ Repost if you believe Black women leaders shouldn’t have to suppress themselves to succeed.

We've all heard it: "You have two ears and one mouth, so listen twice as much as you speak." But what if I told you that conventional wisdom is missing a critical dimension? I've spent decades in boardrooms where being heard wasn't just about waiting my turn to speak. It was about something more far more powerful - overcoming cultural bias by being an intentional and strategic observer. As an unapologetically Black woman who's often been the "only" in the room, I've developed what I call the 70-20-10 rule of meeting presence to keep me in the discussion while keeping my mouth from getting me in hot water. 👈 ✅ 70% of your impact comes from observing—not just listening ✅ 20% is preparation—owning your value and having your talking points ready  ✅ 10% is delivery—standing in your power and addressing not just what's being said, but what's not It wasn't easy. It took trial and error and sometimes stepping in it—being overlooked in meetings, my expertise questioned, abruptly cut off and my words dismissed, just as I began to speak. The 70-20-10 rule isn't just about being heard – it's about command and respect in spaces that still aren't ready for us. In today’s edition of Working While Female, I'll break down exactly how I used this method to transform a boardroom moment from frustration to undeniable confidence and visibility that makes your voice unforgettable. Are you ready to stop just taking up space and start commanding it? #WomenInLeadership #SelfConfidence #CareerAdvice #YourVoiceMatters #BlackWomenLead #RunTheWorld #WomenEmpowerment #WorkingWhileFemale #Strategic70

Tomorrow, I’ll be at the IABA : International Association of Black Actuaries annual meeting. It’s an industry event with: A ton of excitement (and energy).  Top talent and leaders (new + seasoned). That feeling of being seen (like unspoken code). And every year, I walk in with a different lens. Now as a Board Member (and FT business owner), here are 7 lessons I'm carrying with me: (read this 2x if you’re a woman wanting to get to Director or VP) 1. Don’t just network. You have to signal too. People don’t really remember small talk.  But they do remember how you make them feel. Lead with who you want to become (not just your title). 2. Be ready before you feel ready.   Waiting to feel prepared is never the answer. Opportunities don’t wait for perfect timing. Do it scared. Doors open faster that way. 3. Follow up like a peer (not a fan). When you meet a power player, don’t shrink. They need to know you’re someone to build with. Your follow-up should feel like a next step. 4. Value over volume. Being the most vocal doesn’t mean you’re valuable.  But when you speak, make sure it lands. Share your insights. Give access to your mind. 5. Sit close (proximity does matter). Visibility is a form of leverage.  Sit at the table. Ask the question. (women tend to make themselves physically small) Reintroduce yourself if you have to. 6. Use doors that are already open. Someone in your network can vouch for you.  So let them. You don’t have to do this alone. Ask for intros. Let them talk about you in rooms you're not in (yet). 7. How you show up is the message. Posture. Eye contact. Energy. People decide who you are in seconds. Lead with confidence. And let the room adjust to you.  These are the same lessons I used when I worked in insurance. Before running a business full-time.  Before helping women get to Director/VP. And these are same ones I pass to my clients now. (the same ones I’ll carry with me this week) Because no matter how far you go: How you show up still matters. Who is in D.C. this week?

A lot of Black women have been taught to lead with an apology in professional spaces. To seem less “intimidating.” To be more “palatable.” But let’s be clear: you don’t have to dim your light just to make others feel comfortable. Being direct isn’t rude. Being confident isn’t aggressive. You’re not doing too much, you’re doing what’s necessary. Let’s change the language: ❌ “I’m sorry, I know you’re busy but…” ✅ “When you get a moment, I’d like to discuss [topic].” ❌ “I hate to be a pain, but…” ✅ “Circling back to make sure this stays on track.” ❌ “Just wondering if you had any thoughts on…” ✅ “Do you have feedback on [specific item]?” ❌ “I hope this makes sense…” ✅ “Let me know if you need anything clarified.” ❌ “I don’t mean to overstep, but…” ✅ “Here’s a suggestion I believe could add value.” You’re allowed to speak up without softening every sentence. You deserve to take up space without over-explaining why you’re in the room.