How women network differently than men

Many of my female #coaching clients struggle to build and leverage powerful social networks, which can limit their career opportunities. Many women feel uncomfortable "bragging" about their accomplishments, preferring instead to rely on good performance as a primary career strategy. Furthermore, research shows that when they do talk about their accomplishments, doing so has a less positive impact than when men do the same thing. This new research from Carla Rua-Gomez, Gianluca Carnabuci, and Martin C. Goossen shows that women are well served by building high-status networks through shared connections. Women are about one-third more likely than men to form high-status connections via a third-party tie. "Third-party ties serve as bridges, connecting individuals to a high-status network that might otherwise remain out of reach. Such ties help both men and women forge valuable professional connections. But why are third-party ties especially beneficial for women? Because they are not mere connections; they are endorsements, character references, and amplifiers of capability. They carry the implicit approval and trust of the mutual contact. When a respected colleague introduces a woman to a high-status individual, that introduction comes with a subtext of credibility. It signals to the high-status connection that the woman has already been vetted and deemed competent by someone they trust. This endorsement can be a critical factor in gaining access to circles that might otherwise remain closed off due to conscious or unconscious biases." #careerstrategies #women #networking https://lnkd.in/eDBqbQcG

Can we talk about why women's networks look different? 🤔 Because here's what I've noticed (and the research backs this up): We're depth-over-breadth networkers. Which isn't bad - those deep connections are GOLD. But we also need variety in our networks. We tend to connect with people who look like us, are at similar career levels, and earn similar salaries. Again, not terrible, but we're missing out on the power of diverse perspectives and opportunities. We invest HEAVILY in our relationships (as we should!) but then feel weird about asking for referrals or introductions. Like, we'll bend over backward to help someone, but asking them to connect us with their colleague? Suddenly we're all "Oh, I don't want to bother them." 🙄 And here's another thing - we simply have less TIME. Between work, family, and everything else on our plates, networking often gets pushed to the bottom of the to-do list. Understanding these patterns isn't about beating ourselves up. It's about being strategic and building a strong diverse network to support, and who can support you when you need it! P.S. If this landed with you, give it a share - there's probably some women in your network who need to hear this too! 🥰

🎣 “They didn’t even cc me.” This was how Yumi, a senior marketing director, found out her billion-dollar product had been repositioned, without her input. The project she had been leading for 18 months was suddenly reporting into someone else. She didn’t mess up. She wasn’t underperforming. She just wasn’t "there". Not at the executive offsite. Not at the Friday “golf and growth” circle. Not at the CEO’s birthday dinner her male peer casually got invited to. She was busy being excellent. They were busy being bonded. 🍷 When she asked her boss about the change, he was surprised: “You’re usually aligned with the bigger picture, so we assumed it’d be fine.” In Workplace politic-ish: Yumi was predictable. Available. Yet not powerful enough to be consulted. 🔍 What actually happened here? Women are told to build relationships. Men build alliances. Women maintain connections. Men maintain relevance in power circles. It’s not about how many people like you. It’s about how many people speak your name when you’re not in the room. And in most companies, the real decisions - about budget, headcount, succession, are made off-the-clock and off-the-record. 📌 So, how do you stop getting edited out of influence? Try these: 1. 𝗧𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗹 𝗽𝗼𝘄𝗲𝗿 𝗺𝗮𝗽.    Not the org chart. The whisper network / shadow organistion.    Who gets invited to early product reviews?    Who influences without title?    Start mapping that!     2. 𝗔𝘂𝗱𝗶𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗻𝗮𝗺𝗲-𝗱𝗿𝗼𝗽 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗻𝘁.    If your name hasn’t been mentioned by 3 different people in senior leadership this month, you are invisible to power, even if you’re a top performer.     3. 𝗥𝗲𝗱𝗲𝗳𝗶𝗻𝗲 𝗻𝗲𝘁𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴.    Skip the webinars and female empowerment panels.    Start showing up where strategy happens: QBRs, investor briefings, offsite planning, cross-functional war rooms.     4. 𝗖𝗿𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗯𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗻𝗲𝗹.    Schedule recurring 1:1s with lateral stakeholders, not to “catch up,” but to co-build. Influence travels faster across than up.     5. 𝗕𝗲 𝘄𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝗮𝗯𝘀𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝗵𝘂𝗿𝘁𝘀.    If you vanished for 2 weeks and no one noticed, you’re not central enough to promote.     🧨 If any of this feels raw, it’s because it is. Brilliant women are being rewritten out of their own stories, not for lack of performance, but for lack of positioning. That’s why Uma, Grace and I created 👊 𝗙𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝗢𝘂𝘁𝘀𝗶𝗱𝗲𝗿 𝘁𝗼 𝗜𝗻𝘀𝗶𝗱𝗲𝗿: 𝗠𝗮𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝗪𝗼𝗿𝗸𝗽𝗹𝗮𝗰𝗲 𝗣𝗼𝗹𝗶𝘁𝗶𝗰𝘀👊 A course for women who are done watching strategic mediocrity rise while they wait for recognition. It’s not about becoming someone else. It’s about learning the rules that were never designed for us, and playing like you intend to win. 🔗 Get it if you’re ready, link in comment. Or wait until they “assume you’d be aligned,” too.

networking feels harder for women. but it doesn’t have to be 🤷♀️ over the last 5 years i heard this line on repeat: ‘i’m not good at networking’. what women really mean is - the way networking is usually done doesn’t work for me. think about it  -  networking in india often looks like: - late-night mixers; - portfolio huddles where 90% of the room is men; - and more recently, fitness/ sports invites you never got a lot of women worry about perception: ‘will i be judged if i show up here alone?’ or ‘how do i get in?’. add the double shift of work + home, and there’s just less time to “hang out” after work for the sake of connections. but here’s the thing  -  networking isn’t just attending events and exchanging business cards. it can be: - a 30-min coffee with someone in your industry. - breakfast catchups with old colleagues. - swapping book/article recommendations with someone you met recently at a work thing. - dm’ing someone to say ‘i loved your post, here’s what it sparked for me and how i can help’. - hosting 2-3 peers for lunch or a walk once a quarter. and then someone else repeats the same thing, and you show up. more importantly  -  it can now be done over a book club, a random coffee brainstorm, pickleball or a new restaurant discovery 🌱 consistency > volume. but the biggest mistake (men and women both) make? we wait until we need xyz to start networking. that’s like watering your plant only when it’s already dry. and of course, there’s also the laziness syndrome. it’s easier to scroll, binge or say ‘next week pakka’. but the truth is: relationships compound only if you invest in them regularly. and it’s always a two-way street. hacks that work: - put 1 coffee/zoom/meal/ walk a week on your calendar. treat it like a meeting. - pick a person for the week! i’ve been doing it since june and it’s been great! - start small: nurture 5-10 people deeply > 100 loosely. - lead with value  -  share an intro, an idea, a resource. that’s how trust builds. - normalize ‘the ask’. the women who thrived at leap were the ones who asked for intros, roles and partnerships. not the ones who waited for things to happen for them. networking isn’t harder for women because we can’t do it. it feels harder because the old playbook wasn’t written for us. but we’re already writing a new one. and it looks a lot more like breakfast tables, book swaps and safe circles than smoke-filled clubs 😮💨

Women supporting women. Sounds nice, right? But if you’re a woman working in sport, chances are you’re not naturally drawn to “women’s clubs.” Maybe you even prefer the company of men. You’ve been called “one of the guys.” You’re seen as direct, efficient, independent…and you like that.   I get it. For years, I felt the same. Men are straightforward. No drama. And being the only woman? That came with a certain status - I wore it with pride.   And let’s be honest: Many women who thrive in sport carry strong masculine traits. It’s how we survive in a high-performance, high-pressure world. But here’s what I’ve come to realise:   𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐥𝐲 𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝. The unspoken politics in a room full of men. The mental and emotional weight of juggling hormones, cycles, perimenopause while showing up as if nothing’s happening. The internal dance: be visible, but not too much. Be strong, but not cold. Be warm, but not weak. 𝐖𝐞’𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐲. Not weaker. Not less. Just different. And sometimes, it’s just powerful to spar with women who get it... no explaining, no proving, just sharp, honest conversation. Last night, I had dinner with two brilliant women I first met through interviews for my former platform for women in sports, KICK-ES, Mady Tims and Dr. Sandra Meeuwsen. We don’t talk every week. But when we do…it clicks. It’s sharp. Energising. And it’s real. You don’t need a “women’s club.” But having a few women in your corner - the ones who sharpen you, who reflect you - can make all the difference. It’s incredibly powerful to have these women in your network. To have real conversations. The unfiltered ones. About the things that don’t get said in mixed company; where the conversation goes beyond tactics, into what it really takes to lead as a woman in a man’s world.

Men ask me for introductions about 10x more than women, and most of them suck at it. I offer the same thing to anyone in my network: “If there is someone you want an intro to, tell me who and why.” Almost every person who takes me up on it is a man, and more often than not the request lacks thought. No context. No reason. No value for the other person. Years ago I learned that asking for introductions is an actual skill. Done well, it can change your career. Done poorly, it feels transactional and self-serving. Before I ask for an intro, I start with two questions. Why do I genuinely want to speak with this person? Why might they want to speak with me? Too many people stop at the first answer: “Because I want a job there.” That is a reason you want something. It is not a reason they should give you their time. When women ask me for intros, which happens far less often, they usually nail this part. They're thoughtful, intentional, and prepared with relevance rather than entitlement. Every career-changing opportunity I have had came from an introduction. Often from someone I barely knew. Which is why I care about doing this well. I am not going to speculate on why women ask less. I will just say the difference in approach is noticeable. If you want people to open doors for you, here are the simple rules I was taught. How to ask for an intro: 1. Explain why you want to connect. 2. Explain why it makes sense for them. 3. Be specific about the ask (coffee, call, referral, etc.). 4. Send a short blurb the connector can forward. Be concise. Be intentional. Be respectful. The best networking does not feel transactional. It feels reciprocal.