Honoring the Fallen

While many of us will be spending time this long weekend with friends and family enjoying a BBQ or other activities, I hope we can all take some time to reflect upon what Memorial Day is truly meant for. To honor those who gave the ultimate sacrifice in the line of service to something greater than themselves, to our nation, and to all of us. I feel that it is important to extend this honor not only those who fell in battle, or on foreign soil somewhere, but also to those who are currently selflessly serving our forces because we do not know when they might end up having to lay down their lives. I have a story I would like to share with you all so please do read on.

My Grandfather, BM1 Lanzo J. Reo, and Great Uncle, HM2 Frank N. Hansen, both served in the U.S. Navy during World War II. One in the Atlantic and the other in the Pacific. I remember them telling me many a story when I was younger about the things they had been a part of during their time while in the service. Some good. Some bad. I can still see the feeling of pride that they both had when they would share some of the history they had been a part of. At the time I wasn’t entirely sure the direction my life was heading in.

On June 20th 1997 that path became very clear. I remember the funeral service for my grandfather as if it had just happened earlier today. What resonates with me more than anything about the service was when the VFW Vets and a local Navy Honor Guard unit came in to pay their respects to their fallen comrade. Up until that point I had been able to keep it all together. However, after I heard the “Present arms!” command being given I felt the lump in my throat swell. The following succession of “Ready! Aim! Fire!” and a volley of shots being fired in the distance three times caused my eyes begin to fill with tears. The bugler began the playing “Taps” and unleashed the flow of tears that had been building during the 21 gun salute. Once “Taps” was completed and the bagpipes kicked in started playing “Amazing Grace” I was done. I was physically weak and was balling uncontrollably. It was at that point that my call to service became etched in stone.

During my time in the Navy I had the honor and privilege of being able to serve in our local Honor Guard unit where we performed at a countless number of special events, parades, and funeral honors for fallen service men and women. At every Honors ceremony I was a part of, my grandfather’s service always resonated with me as I presented the National Ensign to the fallen’s loved ones. However, there is one Honors ceremony in particular that continues to echo with me to this day. It was a burial for a sailor who was only maybe a year or two older than myself at the time. He was victim to a tragic accident that had happened aboard the ship he was stationed on. He left behind a wife and a daughter who could have only been maybe 2-3 years old. I approached the widow and turned the National Ensign so that the single point of the triangle the flag was folded into was pointing into my chest. I leaned over and looked her in the eyes as I had done many times before. “On behalf of the President of the United States, the Secretary of the Navy, and a Grateful Nation, I present to you our National Ensign as a token of your husband’s faithful and honorable service to the United States Navy and the United States of America.” She reached up from her seat and threw her arms around my neck. I felt her weight trying to pull me down and I tensed up to hold my posture and position strong. The lump that I had felt in my throat so many years ago during my moment had started to come back and my heart was breaking inside for her and her daughter because I understood the feeling all too well. I kept my bearing and she released her hold after a bit and we concluded the service. It was on our way back to home that I thought deeply about that situation.

Many times we focus on those who lost their lives in a battle or hostile area at the hands of those who mean us harm. However, I hope we can all agree that just because a service member didn’t lose his/her life shooting at our enemies, throwing themselves on grenades, being shot down, or drowning to patch a hole in the side of the ship that it doesn’t make their sacrifice less. Here was a young man who was serving his country without regard to his life and lost it in an unfortunate and tragic way while leaving behind a young family. We typically do not know the day of our own reckoning but being willing to serve a cause that could expedite that day is brave and courageous. For that reason I find it prudent that whenever I see a service member or former one, I never hesitate to let them know how much I appreciate their willingness to serve. These men and women serve in many dangerous situations and should be honored for their willingness to do so. They might just be doing their job which may not seem overly dangerous but it may have grave consequences sometimes such as an Aircrew member directing the landing of a helicopter on the small landing pad of a Destroyer in high winds when one of the helicopter props clips the side and a piece of debris strikes them and they bleed out before they can be helped. While we remember those who are the fallen I implore us all thank our current service members when we see them and not hesitate to honor them during the Memorial Day for we do not know when they too might become part of the fallen.