Everlasting Purpose

No matter the directions life's strings pull from, a search for purpose and a greater cause have always been what many veterans struggle with. I know this now more then ever, her name is Cabriella. I feel for many veterans that have gone through so much loss and such quick gain. We become wired differently. We see basic daily chores or actives with a perspective civilians just could not understand. I'm writing this here today because I have found myself at a crossroads. Struggling to turn left or right, only to be scared of making the wrong decision. I thought after leaving the service I had life by the horns. I got an amazing contract, made a bunch of money and had my daughter on the way. Life was great and I had an amazing women by my side with our three kids. Nothing felt better, but yet something was still missing. It was my service, I missed it. I could not simply go to war three times and come home to some typical 9 to 5. I am not wired like most people anymore. My drive for something more always became my downfall. I vested to much time with a growing business opportunity and not enough with the women I love and the kids who called me DAD. Not one day in my years to come will I not regret so many moments I passed up on. Now here I am at these crossroads another contract later, and I'm seeking it more then ever. Life seems easier there well for me at least it does. I worry about my daughter here, but all I can think about is the greater cause. We need able people willing to go do jobs others are not wanting to do in places they are scared to go. My cousin didn't lose half of his face to an EFP for me to sit back and watch how our previous administration ruined what so many of us fought for. he can not go anymore, so I shall go for him, I know everyday he wants to be back in the fight. I know everyday some young kid is getting sent into harms way. So what that does to me is ask why him? Why not me? Send me I will go in his place, or her place. My life has inherited the struggles and although times can be tough I've made it this far already. You can not damage something or someone that has already had so much done. In the years of this line of work I started ( recently ) seeing the greys and the wrinkles maybe a small spot on the the top of my head. That's just the outside, civilians can't see the fire from within. So as you can probably tell in my ramble, everlasting purpose must be of this Great Nation. No matter where that takes me, I will always be a father. It may come from distance but my love for her is pure and it's because that love I have as a parent I know freedom and fighting for that said freedom is whats required for her to grow. It's for every parent here at home raising their children, To protect the innocents of our young. To protect the future for the generations of children to follow. The fire can never go away, a flame may not be lite but a single spark can ignite a mindset few understand.

With Love

God Bless