Don't be an asshole

Being a manager sucks.

Sometimes you need to deal with things that are pretty uncool. Frustrating things. Things nobody prepared you for.

Like telling someone for the 14th time to please come on time. They already have 2 warnings. One more and they're done. And you're sitting there thinking — why am I still having this conversation?

There is one thing I've seen the majority of managers struggle with. And this will sound harsh, but it's exactly how it is.

The biggest piece of advice I would give you is: don't be an asshole.

There we go.

You said, Jon, that's it? Okay and then what? My team is still not following my direction. In fact if I am an asshole and I tell them what to do they follow me.

And you're right. They do.

For about two weeks.

Then they stop caring. Then they do the minimum. Then the good ones leave. Then you're left with the ones who have nowhere else to go — and you wonder why your team feels like dead weight.

Being an asshole works short term. It always does. Fear is a fast motivator.

But you can't build anything on fear. You can only maintain something broken.

The managers I've seen get the most out of their teams — consistently, over years, not just for a quarter — they did one thing differently.

They made their team feel like the outcome mattered. Not to the company. To them personally.

That's it. That's the whole thing.

Not a ping pong table. Not a team building day. Not a motivational speech on a Monday morning.

Just a manager who genuinely gave a damn whether their team succeeded. And made sure the team knew it.

That's harder than being an asshole. Takes longer to work. Doesn't feel as powerful in the moment.

But three years later your team is still there. Still performing. Still improving.

And the asshole manager is on their fourth team wondering why nobody ever stays.

Not trying to sell you anything here.

If you're stuck with your team, don't know what's wrong, and it's driving you mad — just diagnose it first.

25 questions. Under 6 minutes. Free.

Tell me what you get and I'll tell you what to do about it.

→ whatswrongwithmyteam.com