Discover and communicate personal values

- Values are ways of behaving that help us feel in alignment with ourselves and have integrity. Here is a list of prompts that will help you discover yours. First, write down the names of three people you admire and why. Next to each name, write down the qualities that you admire in them. Next, think back to a recent peak experience. What made it meaningful? This is a time when you truly felt alive in an activity that you were engaged in. You felt like you were in flow, fully absorbed in the moment. As you think about what's meaningful about this experience, what are some values that show up? Another useful prompt is to imagine that you're 90 years old and looking back on a fulfilled life, what would have happened? Who would you have become? What qualities do you admire about your future self? When did you act in a way or make a decision that you regretted? What values were compromised? Take some time to consider the answers to your question. I recommend you do this exercise with a friend because others sometimes see what we don't. In the exercise files, you will see a list of values that you may find useful to review. You can pick from these once you've answered the questions. Here's an example of what our friend Anna from the Apollo Project discovered when she did this exercise. As Anna thought about her peak experiences, she discovered that they were usually when she was part of a brainstorming exercise. She realized that she comes alive when working with others to think about what could be possible. One of her core values is imagining what's possible with others. Anna grew up in a large family where her other siblings were always fighting with one another. This frustrated Anna and has shaped one of her other core values which is harmony. Another core value Anna discovered is challenge. Anna is excited by challenge and taking something to the next level. I also recommend that you understand the values of your team members and your workplace. Here are some ways to do that. Notice when others are energized. Ask them what's energizing for them. As a coach, I find that when I share with others what values I'm noticing, it helps them feel appreciated. It also deepens the trust in our relationship. You may even choose to create shared team values. Do this values exercise as a team and commit to a set of values that will advance both trust and achievement of team goals. In the exercise files you will find an example of this from my book, "Wired for Authenticity." Many organizations today create shared values. These are the behaviors that these organizations value in their employees. Review these for your organization and notice the connections. As you exercise your values, be mindful that your own values are very personal and should not be imposed on others. I wish you and your team a great experience of discovering and leading with values.