Emotional Intelligence: The Hidden Driver of Performance and Strong Relationships
With all the focus on AI, automation, and data-driven decision-making, it’s easy to forget that the most meaningful work still happens between people.
The projects that succeed, the ideas that take shape and the teams that thrive all rely on communication, trust and understanding. Yet these are often the first things to unravel when pressure rises.
This is where emotional intelligence (EQ) becomes essential. It helps us stay steady when work feels uncertain, navigate difficult conversations with empathy, and build relationships that support performance and wellbeing.
What is emotional intelligence?
Emotional intelligence is the ability to understand and manage your own emotions and to recognise the emotions of others to build strong relationships.
It influences how we lead, collaborate and make decisions.
Consider the colleague who can calm a tense discussion, the manager who gives challenging feedback without damaging trust, or the team member who notices when someone is struggling before they say anything. That is EQ in action.
Research consistently links emotional intelligence with stronger leadership, higher engagement and lower stress levels at work. Teams led by emotionally intelligent leaders report higher psychological safety, meaning people feel comfortable speaking up, asking questions, and taking considered risks without fear of judgement.
How to build emotional intelligence
If you would like to strengthen EQ at work, try these evidence-based strategies.
1. Name what you feel.
Labelling emotions as they arise builds self-awareness and reduces reactivity. Neuroscience research shows that naming emotions engages the part of the brain that helps regulate responses.
→ Use simple phrases such as ‘I feel anxious’ or ‘I feel optimistic’. Naming emotions helps you step back from them and respond more calmly.
2. Pause before you respond.
When tension builds, take a slow breath before replying. This short pause interrupts the stress response and gives you space to choose a response that fits your values and the purpose of the conversation.
→ When you feel tension rise, breathe in slowly through your nose for four seconds and out through your mouth for six. That longer exhale helps calm the body and gives you space to respond rather than react.
Direkomendasikan oleh LinkedIn
3. Practise perspective-taking.
In moments of disagreement, imagine the situation from the other person’s point of view. Shifting perspective reduces bias, encourages empathy and leads to more collaborative outcomes.
→ If you’re interested in building self-awareness, broadening your perspective, and exploring how psychology shapes everyday life and work, take a look at the new Psychologically Speaking podcast, hosted by me and fellow psychologist Erin Shrimpton. The first episode is out now.
Reflect and connect
Emotional intelligence isn't a soft skill. It is a performance skill that shapes how we think, lead and connect. In a world that's fast changing and increasingly digital, it's what helps us stay human at work.
Strengthening emotional intelligence starts with awareness. The more we understand what drives behaviour, the more effectively we can lead, collaborate and create workplaces where people can truly thrive.
Emotional intelligence in action
Where have you witnessed emotional intelligence in action in the workplace? I'd love to hear about your experiences.
📬 Want deeper reflections on mindset and meaning? I also share articles on Substack.
🎓 Learn from my LinkedIn Learning psychology courses on mindset, wellbeing, and performance.
🎙️ Check out Psychologically Speaking wherever you watch/listen to podcasts.
📌 Save this for the days when work feels tense and you want to stay calm, clear and connected.
Thank you Dr. Emotional intelligence is something that I am currently developing. Whilst I am an empathetic and reflective person, I am guilty of reacting in the moment, as opposed to responding in calm with logic. That pause is what makes the difference, it cuts off the impulsive instant reaction. That single second allows your brain to think, switching off the emotion and process rationale
emotional intelligence is indeed the ability to understand and manage your own emotions and to recognise the emotions of others to build a strong relationships. Thank you Dr Gemma Leigh Roberts
All starts and ends with self-awareness that then enables the EI to kick in and resulting in the human to human connection. I try to remember the self-awareness piece as the kickstart to everything else.
Dr. Gemma Leigh Roberts, thank you once again for your deep insights on emotional intelligence. I agree with you that EI isn't a soft skill; if it were, it no longer is! As they say, the old hard skills have become the new soft skills, and the old soft skills have become the real skills. As a chief learning officer, my worry when I look at the training needs organizations come up with now is this: are people learning the things that would matter? What skills does the workforce need to adapt and navigate uncertainty and, most especially, to stay relevant in a world where AI is taking over routine tasks that many depend on for relevance?
Emotional intelligence is often the differentiator between managers who inspire versus those who merely direct. When people feel genuinely understood, discretionary effort follows naturally. How do you build EI capacity within your leadership pipeline?